I tendered my resignation tonight after 29 years

[Hasmom99]

Sharon,
I have nothing to add to all the wise counsel you have been given on this thread but wanted to tell you that we are here and support you. You are NOT alone and will never be rejected here. I agree that a counselor can help through this challenging time. Sending a (((HUG))).

P.S. We need a HUG smiley.

[Cathy]

[Debbie J]

Hugs to you Sharon!! I can't say anything that hasn't already been said. We love you!

[Luly]

Yes you have had some great advice. All I can say is I know (really know) exactly how you are feeling. The holidays can make every bad experience you have daily seem so much worse. You have lots of friends who care about you and are here. Please take care of yourself and know that it does get easier.

[ChrisR]

Sharon my parents divorced when I was 6 years old. We lived with my Mom and saw Dad twice a week. We usually spent the first half of a holiday with him. He had more income than my mom and was able to buy the extras she couldn't. Also, because he didn't have any other family other than grandma in the area, we usually spent more of a holiday with him than with mom. I didn't love my Dad any more or less than my Mom. I was a child who didn't realize that every time I came home with some goody that Daddy got me that I was reminding Mom how she couldn't do the same. Even to this day, Dad spends 5x on gifts for us than Mom does, but now I am an adult. I NEVER mention this to my mom. Your daughter knows that no matter what you are there for her, but with the understanding and trust of a child. It isn't something she is conscious of on the surface. I know how painful it was to watch him move the last of his things out the other day. A new chapter with all new definitions of "normal" has started in your life. I remember how confused I was at the begining of my parent's divorce, don't make things more confusing for her now with more changes. I also agree with the counseling and know that your cyberfamily here loves you for who you are. I know you want to do what is best for you daughter, but don't forget to take of yourself in the process. That will make things better for her as well. ((((hugs))))

[pamcook]

One more thought (I went through a divorce and also my parents' divorce). As bad as things feel right now, before you know it, you'll wake up one day and think, "Wow. Today isn't as bad as yesterday." And every day, you'll notice you're feeling a bit stronger and more in control. In the mean time, your friends all have the task of reminding you every single day - "Yes, it is going to get better." And we won't get tired of reminding you. {{Sharon}}

[Laurie]

Just know that I'm praying for you and as Pam said, it will get better.

[ESIDER]

Sharon, your friends/"family" on this board have all given you some great advice... please, please listen to them. I know you are hurting but this is not the time for you to be making such impromptu decisions. You have to stay strong for Georgia and yourself. We are all here for you.

Hugs to you both as you work through this very difficult time.

[lbeier]

Hugs. Sharon. I know it seems dark now, but it will get better. Please know you are in our thoughts.

[Holly]

Sharon --my thoughts are this.

Georgia is responding as any normal child would. She knows you are the one who decided to make this split. She is siding with Daddy because she feels you wronged him. She is way too young to know or understand the truth here. She is showing you in a way she can that she wants Mama and Daddy back together.

She is losing her security of a united family and she is losing her home. What could you expect her to do. She probably said to daddy, back when she was sick at his mom's house, that she wanted to go home. He probably told her he could not go home. You did not want him there. Ergo--you are the big bad person wrecking her world.

Don't give up. You know the truth. He made the decisions to act the way he has. He made the decision to make your life hell. He made the decision to nitpick on the split. He made the decision to hound you for more money on the house when he knew you could not come up with it. He did this to make you come to his terms. He is the jackass in this. And when your daughter grows up she will understand this for herself. If you are still in her life.

Maybe it is time you get that attorney.

If you need to move back home, then do it. But is that what you really see for yourself in the future. Your daughter's life will not be the better for it. You need to be close to her, even if it is in a small apartment somewhere in the same city.

Over here, a father must pay monthly child support to you if the child lives with you. And if the child lives with the father, the mother must pay. Are you factoring that in to your decision. Divorce isn't just a matter of splitting the goods, it is also the welfare of the child, and that includes support for them.

We are not there, and so maybe we have it wrong. Maybe she sees him more than we think, and she is doing this. Where was she when you told him to get out. What has she heard during all this time. She can be making you out to be the bad guy, while not understanding what could daddy have done to make him not welcome at home. Maybe she fears you will kick her out too, and so is taking a premptive strike on you.
You and her need good counseling help. NOW! before you do something that can't be undone.
Sharon--get help NOW!

[troublesmom]

My hugs and prayers go out to you also Sharon. Please heed the wonderful advice of your sisters here.

[DonnaMadsenCScrafter]

My heart goes out to you Sharon. Please take the advice of your wise friends here. Please emai us back and let us know how you are doing soon, ok? We are all worried about you. Hugs to you.

[Sharonv]

I am sorry to have caused you all this concern.
I phoned my boss this morning and left a message to say I am not resigning and that I made a rash decision after all the goings on of the past few days. He is very aware of what I am going through.

I am already having counselling, I am already on anti-depressants, I just hate the fact that he has gone. Yes the last time I said get out because I couldn't put up with anymore but he was never going to stay anyway. Georgia does not know that i said get out. She asks me if I love daddy I say yes, because I can't not love him immediately. Then she says well why doesn't daddy come back and I say because he doesn't love me anymore.

Thanks for being here for me and for being my friends.

Sharon

[Cathy]

Sharon, I'm glad you didn't leave your job after all. You need some kind of stability while all this other stuff is going on. Hang in there girlfriend.
Cathy:)

[Luanne]

I phoned my boss this morning and left a message to say I am not resigning and that I made a rash decision after all the goings on of the past few days. Sharon

Darn! I thought I would have to take a trip to Australia to kick your butt! Hmmmm, maybe when it all settles down we can meet up in Thailand!


Seriously, I'm thrilled you are feeling better!!! I was worried!